It Must Have Been Terrible
by Moonshade5
Summary: The Pearl doesn’t leave Jack on the Isle De Muerta, Jack chooses for some reason not to return to Port Royal to be hung, but rather to take a certain blacksmith with him. JW
1. Default Chapter

Title: It Must Have Been Terrible  
  
Author: JackSparrowsWhore  
  
Summary: The Pearl doesn't leave Jack on the Isle De Muerta, Jack chooses for some reason not to return to Port Royal to be hung, but rather to take a certain blacksmith with him. J/W  
  
Rating: R  
  
Beta'd by: Laurel!  
  
Warnings: This story involves hot-guy lovin. If you are offended by M/M relationships, then this story is not for you. I do however advise you to watch POTC again.  
  
Disclaimer: It's guys like you Mickey! Oh what you do Mickey do Mickey, don't break my heart Mickey! (They belong to the mouse!)  
  
Author Notes: And just when you thought it was over. Lol, This is the second fiction by the writer JackSparrowsWhore. Woooo. Sense the enthusiasm. It has nothing to do with my first fic (Happily Ever After) But I hope it will be quirky. Good word quirky. So hopefully I learned something from the first exploit However probably not. Armed with my beta Laurel, I shall journey forth into the horror of another chapter fic. Also I would most appreciate any and all reviews. REVIEW (it's my mantra)  
  
A/N2: Time goes sorta fast at first so  
  
********* = time passing  
  
Chapter 1: It Must Have Been Terrible  
  
The pirate trudged over a dune.  
  
"It must have been terrible for you Jack." He mumbled. "Well it bloody is now!"  
  
He kicked the ground stubbornly before looking up to see white sails.  
  
"They'll be no living with her after this."  
  
It had of course been one of the Royal Navy. And to someone's luck (certainly not Jack's) it was Commodore Norrington's (the tight-ass himself) ship.  
  
Jack now stood forlornly between two guards as the young and lovely Elizabeth screamed haughtily at the commodore.  
  
".as a wedding present!"  
  
That made the captain's ears prick.  
  
"Why Elizabeth! Are you accepting the commodores proposal?"  
  
"I am."  
  
Well if it worked.  
  
"Weddings! I love weddings! Drinks all around!" Jack cringed at the disapproving glares. "I know clap 'im in irons." Thankfully however no irons came.  
  
You will escort these fine gentlemen to the helm whereupon you will give them the bearings to Isle De Muerta. You will then spend the remainder of the voyage contemplating all the possible meanings of "Silent as the grave." Is that clear?"  
  
"Inescapably."  
  
And what motive had he to escape? He wanted his ship back. He really wanted his ship back. And he was going to get it back. He smiled happily as he rowed into the catacombs of the islands.  
  
*** "You don't want to be doing that."  
  
"Oh I really think I do."  
  
"Fine it's your funeral." Shrugged Jack.  
  
Barbossa paused for the second Jack needed to make his argument.  
  
*** "Oh by all means, kill the whelp, just-"  
  
Jacks eyes darted over to said whelp who was glaring at him with a mix of hatred and.well.whatever it was it stung. Jack wished he could soften his expression and drop the poker-face. But that would cost him his boat er ship.  
  
*** "And I would buy you a hat, a great big one, with a feather."  
  
*** Well it could be going worse. Will was still giving him that very terrible stare, that Jack had spent the past 10 minutes or so interpreting. There was definite anger there. But also something softer; hurt. Will had depended on him. But they were all men of their word. Except for Elizabeth, who was, in fact, a woman. Stupid whelp. Making his nerves burn, sending little pricking daggers of remorse.  
  
"You see I'm a dishonest man. But you con always trust a dishonest man to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you 'ave to look out for. Because you can never tell when they'll turn around and do something, inc'edbly stupid."  
  
Jack gave the boy what he hoped was a very meaningful look, before tossing him a sword and leaping off into another swashbuckling melee.  
  
There was something in Turner that just clicked when Jack fought. The two melded together and dueled as one, moving in time to the swirling blades.  
  
But Jack had bigger fish to fry. Will could manage a few undead vicious pirates on his own.  
  
"I'll teach you the meaning of pain."  
  
Jack's head whipped around. Whelp?  
  
"You like pain? Try wearing a corset!"  
  
Oh. Right. Elizabeth.  
  
Swash, swash, buckle, buckle. Ouch. Jack looked down mightily confused and saw a sword sticking out of his stomach. This certainly was a new development. He tottered backwards into the moonlight.  
  
"That's interesting..." The now immortal Captain Jack Sparrow. "Coul'n't resist mate!"  
  
And that set them off again. Jack's hapless glances off to secure Will's position, resulted in the searing brown eyes locked on him, in different levels of strangled emotion. Definitely not good for concentration.  
  
Jack paid his blood, Barbossa pulled a pistol on Elizabeth, and Will leapt to the chest. Really like shooting Will's darling strumpet would in any way hinder Jack. She had, after all, gotten rid of the rum.  
  
BOOM  
  
"After all that time, and you waste your shot." Smirked Barbossa  
  
"He didn't waste it." Ah, dear William.  
  
'Of course not' thought Jack. 'no' that dense.'  
  
Will and Elizabeth ran to each other, bloody emotion. Did no one care for poor Cap'n Jack? He looked forlornly at his bloody hand and shook it sadly. It stung a bit and Will and Elizabeth swooning over each other was sure as hell not helping it any.  
  
Treasure, would surely remedy the situation. Lots of it.  
  
'For example,' he thought 'that heapin' mass o' gold might cut it.'  
  
Jack shifted through the loot trying to ignore the awkward romance blossoming just yards to his left. He didn't know why it bothered him so much. Elizabeth was a fair lass. Aside from the rum burning incident of course. And Will was- he didn't know what Will was. Was Will more then Will? And if so how much more? But really why was he even entertaining this tangent, when clearly Will was nothing more then a- which started him over from where he had begun. Well he was a whelp anyhow. He would leave it at that.  
  
But why did two. decent people together become so detestable? Jack's ears were listening intently to the lover's conversation, which had come to a decisive standstill.  
  
It was the opportune moment for Will. Must. Spoil. It. He started hurling treasure over his shoulder, which resulted in a satisfyingly distracting clang. He felt two sets of eyes immediately on him. So far so good, now all he had to do was depend on the whelp to do something incredibly stupid. Which thankfully he did.  
  
"We best head back to the ship. Your fiancée will be waiting."  
  
Elizabeth was appropriately fuming and stormed from the cave. The opportune moment for Jack had arrived.  
  
'Wait a tick.' Thought Jack 'What was I opportunely waiting for.' There was a brief pause as Jack considered this, but he pulled a blank. So he decided as long as the moment was there he might as well do something. He sidled alongside and the boy and said:  
  
"Shall we be goin' now?" What? That couldn't be right.  
  
"Going where?" asked Will blankly, his eyes moving slowly to rest on the pirate.  
  
"Back to the Pearl of course!"  
  
"But the rowboat."  
  
"I saw another a ways back. I thin'.anywho let's be off!"  
  
Will sighed resignedly "Alright." He began to follow Jack through the caves.  
  
'Wait a minute.' Thought Jack. 'Wait-a-minute. Somethin's no' righ' here.' But what? Will was there. Check. Pearl. Check. Already they had emerged into the chill night and he could see the sails waving invitingly. Himself. Check. Eliz- THAT WAS IT! No lass! No bonnie -bloody-lass! Yes this was good. After all that it seemed a shame for Will to want to leave her.  
  
Now this was just unreasonable. Jack turned to Will who was still following him, head down.  
  
"WILL!"  
  
"What?" Will looked a bit taken aback at the sudden din.  
  
"ELIZABETH!"  
  
"What about her?"  
  
"WILL!"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"ELIZABETH!" Jack was waving his arms about frantically.  
  
" I could swear he's trying to talk to me." muttered Will.  
  
"WILL, WILLIAM, TURNER!"  
  
"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JACK WHAT!"  
  
Jack did a very dramatic stumble backwards.  
  
" It's just that you don't really seem to care much for the lass. No?" Jack had fallen into the boat and was now in a very inopportune position to do anything but pout.  
  
"Jack don't you get it? Do you not know?"  
  
Jack blinked.  
  
"Never mind Captain let's go."  
  
A/N THAT was Long. I am having capitliazation problems. Also spelling problems. Lol, I hope it gets better. I hope you liked it anyhow. If you did REVIEW. If you didn't...REVIEW! lol! Thankyou thankyou!  
  
Jack- 'Do you not know' Who talks like that?  
  
JSW- People in lord of the rings!  
  
Jack- Lord of the-what?  
  
Will- It's the best movie ever! Man legolas he's so hot he was all like killing stuff and stuff!  
  
Jack- I need rum..  
  
JSW- GREAT! TO THE GREEN DRAGON  
  
Will- YAY!  
  
Jack- Oi. 


	2. Saturday Night In The Captains Clothes

Title: It Must Have Been Terrible  
  
Author: JackSparrowsWhore  
  
Summary: The Pearl doesn't leave Jack on the Isle De Muerta, Jack chooses for some reason not to return to Port Royal to be hung, but rather to take a certain blacksmith with him. J/W  
  
Rating: R  
  
Beta'd by: LAUREL!  
  
Warnings: Naughty pirate language! Also this story involves hot-guy lovin. If you are offended by M/M relationships, then this story is not for you. I do however advise you to watch POTC again.  
  
Disclaimer: It's guys like you Mickey! Oh what you do Mickey do Mickey, don't break my heart Mickey! (They belong to the mouse!)  
  
Author Notes: So anyway I have foolishly submerged myself in two fics. Well we'll see, so I'm going to update alternately. Which will be FUN! Lol, no, so the idea for this chapter of filth came from my poor beta who was ill. So then I thought, what if Will was ill and Jack had to take care of him. How ADORABLE would that be? Very I think. So here we go. R-E-V-I-E-W sock it to me! I love every single letter that you write! Thank you so much to all of you that review! May your days be blessed with rum! Also the title for this chapter came from a Beck song, very special.  
  
'thoughts' ~~~~~~~ time pass ~*~*~*~*~*~* scene change  
  
Chapter 2: Saturday Night In The Captain's Clothes  
  
They had been at sea a few weeks. At first the crew had ventured to take Will under their wing as an apprentice, but that hope was quickly unraveled as Will showed general inability to accomplish.well.anything at all. He couldn't even accomplish tasks such as rigging a sail, and if Jack had found the poor boy any later the whelp would have certainly hung himself. The crew then began to amuse themselves by giving Will various jobs just to see how he could muck them up.  
  
After a while however, the floundering fellow went from humorous to outright pathetic. After about the 5th time he fell into the great sea, they determined him unfit to serve above deck.  
  
"He was fine on the Interceptor.." Muttered Gibbs as he watched their captain haul Will out of the water.  
  
Ana Maria stared at him blankly "Is everyone on the bloody boat fucking diluted!"  
  
"I'm afraid I don't get ye meaning."  
  
"Look" the woman pointed at Jack who was swatting Will on the back frantically trying to dislodge the many gallons of water he had ingested.  
  
"Yea I see em, poor boys got no skill for the sea."  
  
"No!" howled Ana "Look at Will!"  
  
"What have I been looking at all this bloody time!"  
  
Ana slapped her forehead and grated "Who. Is. With. Will?"  
  
"Why Cap'n Jack."  
  
She spread her arms in a gesture that displayed blatant obviousness.  
  
"Wha' are ye drivin at Ana."  
  
She screamed in outrage and stomped off, direly agitated, to take off her grievances on some hapless crewmember.  
  
Gibbs shook his head "Women.."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Are ye alrigh' there?" Jack was looking concernedly at Will who was shaking violently on his bed. The pirate had managed to haul the boy downstairs to his cabin with no help from the crew he might add. Every time he had solicited them as their CAPTAIN, they just scurried off meekly to some other chore and gave little frightened glances towards Ana Maria. So when Jack acquiesced her assistance, all he got was a scowl and a slap in the face. Which was very upsetting as he really HADN'T done anything at all.  
  
It was all very confusing for Jack. First the boy in a complete change of attitude left his darling lass for the life of a pirate, then said boy showed completely none of his formal skill, had almost died many times. And now to top it all off, his crew had clearly all gone mad.  
  
"Do ye have anymore dry clothes lad?"  
  
Will shook his wet head forlornly and stared at the floor.  
  
Jack felt he should have been annoyed with this, but wasn't, which was strange. He must be going mad as well. Ah well, knew it would happen someday at any rate.  
  
"Well you better wear something o mine." Jack sighed and turned to give Will his privacy and have a VERY long and detailed chat with Ana.  
  
Achoo  
  
Jack stopped. Hold it. Was tha a sneeze?  
  
ACHOO  
  
Damn. Jack turned around slowly.  
  
ACHOO!  
  
"No no no no don't do that boy!" he said waving his arms frantically as if the movement might remedy the situation.  
  
*ACHOO!"  
  
"Alrigh there Turner?"  
  
Will's eyes watered threateningly. It was going to be a long night.  
  
TBC  
  
A/N I'm tired Sorry.  
  
Will: Whab? Yer jub going to leab me here wib a stuffy nobe! ACHOO  
  
Jack: WHAT! YER JUST GONNA LEAVE ME HERE WITH HIM AND HIS NOSE!  
  
JSW: Yes, that would be the plan, I need a nap.  
  
Legolas: Ta da!  
  
JSW: AHHHH LEGGY!  
  
Jack: Wha- in the blazes!  
  
Will: oooooooh pretty!  
  
Legolas: You aren't too bad yourself.  
  
JSW: * meep *  
  
Jack: Whats this now-  
  
Will: gawk  
  
Jack: Ok none of this * pußshes Leggy out of fic* Where's the author I'm going to kill her.  
  
JSW: Oop that's my cue to scadoo! 


	3. Love Machines On The Sympathy Crutches

A/N Very glad you like the little dialogues at the end. I might do a PotC/Lotr crossover humour.orgy..slashy..funny...situation. My beta was nagging anyway. Lol, sso Chapter 3 I think? YES I DO! You know what I need a title for this chapter. You know who I will ask for said title? BECK! Lol  
  
Chapter 3: Love Machines On The Sympathy Crutches  
  
"An' then the giant sai' to the boy he says 'Jack! Ye can take me gold and me ship! An' I claim thee the most fearsome pirate in all the world-"  
  
"That's not how it goes."  
  
Jack glared down at the boy who was still shivering, wrapped in an odd arrangement of clothing and entwined in the eccentric coverings of Jack's bed. Will had in fact not asked for a story, but received one anyway. He wasn't sure if this was reward or punishment, as Jack seemed to be the hero in every one. The captain in fact, had even gone so far as to recite his daring encounter with a plum in a Christmas pie.  
  
"I'm tellin' the story here!" Jack growled. The pirate looked at the quivering boy whose pale face was bright red with fever. He had seemed to have created a nest in his bed. 'Not just a whelp.' Thought Jack 'A bird whelp, that.nests..'  
  
"Jack?"  
  
The captain was stirred from his reverie from the quavering voice of his self-inflicted charge.  
  
"Jack, why haven't you kicked me off your crew?"  
  
"Believe me, I've trie'! Why do ye think ye keep fallin into the bloody sea!" He had meant it as a joke, but the pained look that crossed Will's faced showed that he was far from in on it.  
  
"Were you really trying to get rid of me? I'm sorry-"  
  
Jack was now very convinced everyone had gone mad but him. Actually he wasn't so sure about him either.  
  
"Wha's in yer head boy?"  
  
"I don't know. Why? Is it important? Are you going to strand me? I can try harder! What do you look for in a crewmember? Can I attain it?"  
  
"No reason, no' really, I'm not going to strand ye, washboard abs, and with prac'ice.yes."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Ana I don't understan' why ye wouldn't let us help Jack."  
  
Anamaria was trying very hard to concentrate on the horizon head of her, instead of the asinine fool beside her.  
  
"Because, then we would all be down there."  
  
"Yes togethe'! Aiden young William! No' a one would be alone with him for a mite! The others woul' be righ' there at his side! Constantly! Without break."  
  
"Exactly."  
  
"I dun understand ye mind Ana."  
  
"Mr. Gibbs, can ye not see that."  
  
"That what?"  
  
However there were no words. But Ana was a stubborn woman and would not give up until her point was across.  
  
"Why would Jack want to spend time alone with Will, Gibbs?"  
  
The older pirate seriously considered a moment.  
  
"Why I dunno Ana. Will is a very handsome youth, whilst Cap'n Jack is a rugged, mysterious, experienced sailor. I 'aven't a clue."  
  
Anamaria was seriously considering suicide.  
  
TBC...  
  
JSW: YAY! That came out well I think!  
  
Will: #pout#  
  
JSW: What's wrong NOW!  
  
Will: I miss Leggy.  
  
Jack: NO! NO ye don't miss tha' nancing elf!  
  
JSW: Oh? Is someone getting jealous of their Willpoo?  
  
Will: What did she just call me?  
  
Jack: Willpoo..do you no' like it?  
  
Will: Nooo..  
  
Legolas: Oh my darling Willykins!  
  
Jack: Willykins?  
  
Will+JSW: YAY! LEGGY-LAMB!  
  
Jack: OH NO YOU DON'T!  
  
^Tackles Leggy off into closet^  
  
Will: Huh.  
  
JSW: Yea...  
  
^awkward pause^  
  
Will: So...wanna go braid each others hair?  
  
JSW: OK! 


	4. You Talk Too Much

A/N I'm SORRY that Will Is always a lil OOC but that's how he gets written. Think of him as chibi Will. Not quite as big as...big Will. Whoa I was just like shaking my head and now I don't feel good. So anyway I'm updating all of my fics as fast as I possibly can. Bear with me please. That's all I ask. Alright..wear was I? Oh yes chapter 4! It will be called...hmmmmmmmm. Wait what's that? Thank you the Strokes!  
  
Chapter 4: You Talk Way Too Much  
  
A sharp banging made Jack leap to his feet. Well sort of, he leapt to his feet only to find a chair in his way and fell gracelessly onto the bed. Thankfully a very cushy invalid was there to break his fall.  
  
"Owwwww! Jack!"  
  
"Sorry. Sorry luv couldn't 'elp it, you're just so squishy an all." He smiled wolfishly.  
  
But there was that accursed banging to attend to that had been the source of all his woe. He sauntered over to the door, and upon opening it discovered it to be a slap in the face.  
  
"Ouch! Why please did tha' happen?"  
  
"Because you're a bloo'y fool and you deserve it!"  
  
"Ana, as much as it brings me joy to hear ye tell me off.."  
  
^slap^  
  
"Ge' out of thes room Sparrow!"  
  
"Alrigh' alrigh'!"  
  
Jack was beginning to not like Ana so much either. he didn't remember her as being quite so mean. Women.very confusing.  
  
Once Jack had confusedly left the room, the young woman knelt beside the wide-eyed boy.  
  
"I know."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I KNOW."  
  
"Know what?"  
  
"Ye know what I'm talking abou'!"  
  
"I'm sorry Ana, but I must confess that I-"  
  
"YES YOU FUCKING DO! OK!"  
  
Will had crouched down into the blankets and his answer was a barely audible squeak.  
  
"Ok I know I know!"  
  
She sighed. Being intimidating was amusing but nonetheless took effort. "So what are ye going to do abou' it?"  
  
"Excuse me. Miss Maria, but what is It that I know again?"  
  
Ana's eye started to twitch. Men...daft...no...sense..stupid..grrr.  
  
"Will I know tha' ye fancy the cap'n."  
  
"Oh ok- WHAT!" he suddenly sprang to his feet and Ana would later tell in tale that he seemed to leap straight skyward. "How do you know? Is it that obvious? No! Please don't tell Jack!"  
  
"Will luv, it is tha' obvious, it is tha' painfully obvious."  
  
William looked about ready to combust at these words.  
  
"Bu' it's only obvious to me. As I am the only one with any sense it seems." She sent a scornful backwards glance towards the closed door. "I won't tell Jack.but Turner, if ye don do somthin' I'm afrai' he really will have to strand ye somewhere."  
  
Exeunt Ana Maria.  
  
As soon as she had departed Jack rushed back into the room frantically.  
  
"Are ye alrigh'? She didn't slap ye did she?"  
  
"She might as well have."  
  
"Wha?"  
  
"Jack?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Never mind."  
  
A/N Sorry I like the dialogue. Not really an inspiration day for me today..mmmmmm sorry. I will try harder.but an update is an update no? And it will keep my beta from committing suicide, so it's all good.  
  
Jack: I coulda writ a bette' chapter then tha'!  
  
JSW: Jack you can't write.  
  
Jack: Yer point bein...  
  
JSW: ^sigh^ never mind. Hey what happened to Will and Leggy?  
  
Jack: .....  
  
JSW: Great..  
  
Jack: Uh oh.  
  
JSW: Well we better find them before it gets too out of hand. I don't want my lil universe getting all messed up. 


	5. None Of This Now

A/N: Sorry I'm sorry really sorry. Really I am, you have to believe me here people. I'm just a lazy bum that lounges around consuming chocolate and watching Johnny Depp movies! Really ask my beta! She knows! Well what I'm trying to say is, please don't flog me for not updating. I've been in.....Mexico.....where computers don't exist. Hanging out with Agent Sheldon Jeffrey Sands. Ok maybe a better way to express my deep deep regret is to get on with the chapter eh? That would be best...  
  
Chapter 5: None of This Now  
  
Ana was at the wheel. Her hands were clenched around the wooden spokes so tightly that her fingers were beginning to make a slight indent. Strands of dark hair were flying free of her bandana, she hadn't slept for a while, and there were dark circles under her eyes. Also, as a side note, all men are stupid.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`The Day Before`~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Will was up and about, Ana had visited him once again, words of a threatening nature were said, and miraculously Will recovered enough to do ship work. That however was about 3 days before this day before. Ever since Will had found his 'sea legs' (to the astonishment of the rest of the crew) he had stayed very far away from a certain captain (Jack...) This at first was nice. Until:  
  
"Ana, could you tell Jack the brig has a leak?"  
  
"Ana could you tell Jack the sail has been mended?"  
  
"Ana, could you tell Jack that we're approaching port?"  
  
"Ana, coul' ye tell the whelp tha' we need more rum?"  
  
"Why a'e you doin it too?"  
  
"Oh. I though' tha's what we were doing... No?"  
  
It had been tedious to say the least.  
  
But the day before (yesterday) the usually well-stocked Pearl had run out of rum. Which was interesting. However it was not so interesting for Jack as it was catastrophic. He had shut himself in his cabin and refused to come out. This was very fascinating for the crew, who had decided that no captain meant no work.  
  
Ana had tried to keep them in line for a while, but her hand had gotten sore from slapping so many faces. Will had stood by her for a time, but he kept meandering out of his line of work to pace frantically outside of Jack's door. So Ana had eventually excused him from duty.  
  
Will ventured knocking on the captain's door, but was only received with: "Are ye rum?"  
  
"No-Jack I-"  
  
"Go away then! ^incoherent mumbling about rum and rum accessories^"  
  
It had all been very trying for Ana.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~` 3 Days Later`~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (Or rather 2 days after the beginning, and 3 days after the middle.)  
  
Jack had been sitting in his cabin for 3 days now, in various positions of disarray: slumped over chairs, hanging from the chandelier, jerking off, etc. At the moment he was resting his head in the ship's porthole window, staring puppy-like into the horizon. There was a knock on the door. Not unlike the knocks that had been plaguing his existence whilst he was trying to be morose. Bloody whelp. However, it was...sweet of him to worry. Do pirates use that word? He thought not, but in a world without rum anything was plausible.  
  
The knocking continued.  
  
"Is et rum?"  
  
"Yes actually." Came the reply from the other side.  
  
Jack leapt to his feet and scrambled over to the door, dread-locks akimbo. He flung open the door which smacked across the wall with a healthy bang.  
  
Was not actually rum.....was Will. WITH RUM!  
  
"Oh Will me darlin perfec' angel of all thing's black n' weasly! Ye've brough' me my rum!"  
  
Jack grasped the boys shoulders and pulled him into his cabin.  
  
"Oh William I coul' just abou' marry ye right now!"  
  
"Really?"  
  
Will was not however answered as several bottles had been opened. Jack had never ceased his dancing.  
  
"Oh happy day! The rum be here! Hooray!" he suddenly stopped and gave Will a side ways look. "An' look....ye brought et for me...." Tears started to well in his dark eyes. "Bless ye ladie..." he swept Will up in a giant pirate/bear hug and began kissing him madly.  
  
Will blushed.  
  
TBC:  
  
Jack: THE RUM WA' GONE!  
  
JSW: It came back.....  
  
Jack: Et wa' gone........  
  
JSW: But now, it's back.  
  
Will: Ta-da!  
  
JSW: As is Will!  
  
Jack:......  
  
JSW: I'm sorry Will love, he's a bit distraught right now.  
  
Will: Ok. So an elf in leather wouldn't be what he'd want to see right now?  
  
JSW: Uuum no......  
  
Will: Ok well then don't go in the 4th floor storage closet. I'll be right back.....  
  
^silence^  
  
JSW: oooooooooook........ 


	6. Oh My God

A/N I feel I begin every update with an apology. Sorry, sorry, really sorry. Yes sorry. Hmm my key board seems to have gone a bit mad, Interesting. Anyhow I was reading over my fic and I found that it really didn't follow any coherent plot line, and that depressed me quite a bit. So this time, I will try to pick up where I left off, and so progress in some manner. Thank you for your patience. (and your reviews.......review!)  
  
Chapter 6: Oh. My. God.  
  
The crew had mixed feelings about Jack's 'recovery'.  
  
Ana had decided it was high time that she got the break that she so richly deserved. However the universe had other plans for her.  
  
"Ana?"  
  
"Will?"  
  
"Ana...."  
  
"Will??"  
  
"Ana..."  
  
"WILL!"  
  
"Come to think of it Miss Ana, it really doesn't matter after all..." Ana sighed. It was hard being the only remotely sane person on board. This had to stop. And the only way to stop it was to do the unthinkable. Have a rational conversation with Jack. She shuddered at the very thought.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Jack?"  
  
"Ana?"  
  
"Jack."  
  
"Ana."  
  
"I got to talk to ye Jack."  
  
"Eh?"  
  
"It's abou' the boy."  
  
"The whelp boy?"  
  
"Yea, youn' Will."  
  
"Wha' about 'im? He hasn't fallen over agai' 'as he?" he gave a concerned little squint into the water.  
  
"No."  
  
"Oh. Thas good. Be seein ye later then?"  
  
"Righ'."  
  
Ana turned and walked out the door feeling strangely satisfied.  
  
She stopped. She thought.  
  
"Oh. Fuck.  
  
JAAAACK!"  
  
"What!"  
  
"I need to talk to ye!"  
  
"Wasn't tha' jus' wha' we were doin?"  
  
"Yea....I mean no. MY GOD JACK SPARROW YOU LE' ME IN NOW!"  
  
The door opened slowly.  
  
"Cap'n Jack Sparrow..."  
  
"Do ye like him at all?"  
  
"Who?"  
  
"The boy." Ana grated.  
  
"The whelp boy?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Jack shrugged "I wouln't kick him outta bed if ye know wha' I- "  
  
"I do." "Is tha' all then?"  
  
"So yer sayin yer not secretly madly in love with the boy?"  
  
"The whelp boy?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Jack scrunched up his nose "I dun think so. Am I?"  
  
"Are you?"  
  
Jack shrugged.  
  
"Ye'll never confess yer love to him then shag like rabbits?"  
  
"Uuum, improbable."  
  
"HA! Tha's not impossible!" Any ground gained was good ground.  
  
"I guess it coul' happen.... Maybe... who knows."  
  
Comparatively it had gone very well.  
  
TBC A/N JSW: AHHHH! How can I salvage this!  
  
Johnny: -shrugs-  
  
JSW: Uh, excuse me, but who are you?  
  
Johnny: Oh hi, I'm Johnny Depp.  
  
JSW: 0.0  
  
Johnny: Uh hey, I saw this guy in a crazy getup chasing this blonde girl with pointy ears.... Should I be worried.  
  
JSW: Yes and no.  
  
Johnny: Alright.  
  
-silence-  
  
Jack: I'LL GET YE YOU NANCIN PRICK!  
  
Legolas: AHHHHHHHHH!  
  
JSW: Mostly yes........ 


End file.
